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OK so yesterday we went to church and I got to sing for the first time in over a year !! It was nice to be able to sing I thought i might not be able to any more because it had been so long !!! Then we went to our Battalion Christmas party they had a chili cook off and a dessert cook off I did not like ANY of the chili but whatever they also had 2 big bounce around things for the kids Titus and Levi LOVED it !! Then Santa came in and they all got pictures with him it was kinda funny to see Santa holding all three boys at one time !! Today i am taking the boys to the Dr Caleb is very sick with a bad cough and runny nose and Levi has been coughing too, they are seeing the same Dr but there is 2 hours between the times !! UGH that kinda stinks !! Only one week til Kevin has 2 weeks off and Titus too I am so excited for that time just our family. Kevin is leaving in 8 weeks for iraq, I am getting more and more sad and nerves the closer it gets. I can not imagine watching him get in the bus and leaving me and the boys standing there alone. Kinda like the pictures and videos they have of it always make me cry and I don't even know them. Now it is gonna be ME, US, My babies are the ones missing daddy, I can not even imagine not having my husband and help meet for a whole year. Kevin says "we will be stronger and more in love for it" I am not worried about us I know we were meant to be together and I could not live without Kevin but I am so worried about the boys. I just do not want them to resent us for this later, you know him being gone all the time and moving around all the time" ARMY life" all that. I don't know maybe I am over thinking it but it is just how I feel and am thinking !! Well that is all for now I guess I just kinda need to vent and I know the only people reading this is family so I really wanted all of you to know that is how I have been feeling lately!!